Copywriting Mistakes I Spotted in May and How to Avoid Them
Not everyone who’s asked to write copy is a full-time copywriter. This is why an editor, or just a second pair of eyes, is a godsend. Sometimes you’re faced with a writing task, possibly in your second language, and with no editor on hand. Don’t panic!
I see websites, press releases and articles all over the internet (and the physical world) riddled with errors – and it can reflect pretty badly on the business. But I’m here to help you avoid mistakes and teach tactics and tips can you use to improve your writing overall. Let’s unpick some mistakes I spotted so far in May and find ways to avoid them in your writing.
1. Cultural sensitivities and connotations
Although this sounds like a perfume ad, I found this in a hotel’s description of its spa atmosphere and interior. And I found it really odd. I can see that they’re trying to call out Asian-inspired décor, possibly east-Asian or south-east-Asian-inspired, I can’t quite remember. But I’m not sure that anyone wants to partake in something that has ‘echoes of the empire’, since it’s fairly well-acknowledged now that empires are not a positive thing and were the site and cause of many of histories atrocities. Describing anything as harking back to an ‘empire’ just seems like it might have racist undertones. What is it about ‘the empire’ era that they actually want to evoke here? I’m sure its not slavery, oppression and violent takeovers.
I also highlighted ‘exotic’ here. It’s not always a bad word, but whether something is ‘exotic’ is very dependent on the perspective of the intended audience. It’s often used in a Euro-centric way – if you assume pineapples, rainforest-dwelling birds and tropical downpours are ‘exotic’ you have assumed your audience is only from Europe and north America. If you want to speak to a wider audience, ‘exotic’ might not be the right choice of adjective – never mind that it’s not particularly descriptive anyway.
How to avoid it?
Try to read everything through with a ‘cultural sensitivity’ head. Think about the historical connotations of your phrasing to both the intended audience, and anyone else who might right it. You can apply the same thinking to check your piece isn’t sexist or able-ist too, for example.
Always double-check your adjectives. What does that adjective mean? What are you trying to evoke? Is there a better or more-precise way you can express this?
Get a second pair of eyes who is a native speaker of the language you’re writing in. They’ll spot cultural insensitivities and obscure connotations you might not have thought of.
2. Overly formal language & the wrong variant of English
This error isn’t that bad at all – it’s only just an error. But it did stand out to me, because the text jarred as I read it. This was a fun, upbeat piece highlighting the best rooftop bars in Bath (a city in southwest England). So, when I reached the end paragraph and read ‘in conclusion’ it felt weirdly formal and out of place. It’s commonly used in academic essays, and often when people are writing essays to sit English language exams, so it breaks the friendly, informal tone of voice completely.
Secondly, ‘savor’ uses the US English spelling. It should be ‘savour’ in British English. While mixing US and UK Englishes may not seem too bad, it shows up immediately to a native-speaker audience. Since the article was on a British website talking about a city in England – UK English would have been the right choice.
How to avoid it?
Make sure your spellchecker is set to the correct variant of English, this will weed out any American spellings or word choices.
If your using a piece written for the US and repurposing it for a UK audience (or vice versa) have a professional linguist adapt it for you. Details matter.
Check that your tone of voice is consistent throughout your piece. You can read through the whole thing in one go to get a sense of flow, and you can hone in on and evaluate your word choices. Often times, introductory phrases that we’re taught in school or academia (‘in conclusion’, ‘moreover’, etc.) just aren’t needed in regular writing, you can dispense with them completely.
3. Missing commas and tone-of-voice questions
To the grammatical error first… to me, this list makes it sounds like the hotels ‘with hot water bottles and DJs’ are one entity. I.e. they have hot water bottles and they have DJs, perhaps as part of some kind of exceptionally laid-back rave experience. I’m fairly sure the author meant to highlight that some hotels are cosy (hot water bottles) and others have a party atmosphere (with DJs). You could use the (much maligned) Oxford comma to solve the issue, or you could reword it altogether:
“from afternoon tea with cats and parks full of deer to cosy boutique stays with complimentary hot water bottles and hotels hosting DJ nights”.
I actually really enjoy the tone of voice in this piece. It’s playful, bold and upbeat. I don’t love the use of the word ‘swish’ – I’m not sure who’s the target market for that – and I don’t love ‘nightlife nuts’ and ‘country bumpkins’. I feel like the second one has slightly too negative connotations and could just seem a bit rude. I’m not sure who it’s speaking to. Who identifies with it?
How to avoid it?
Proofread your work or have it editor/proofread by somebody else. A second pair of eyes will zero in on your grammatical errors.
Read your work aloud too. When you read the sentence aloud without the comma, you hear the issue.
Tone of voice is trickier. It’s a bit about practise and a bit about having a good sense of what your tone is and what words and phrases are associated with your brand or tone. Working on TOV is quite a skill, and it’s something a professional can help you solidify.
📧 Want to cultivate a tone of voice that’s consistent and echoes your brand’s ideals? I do that! 🙋 get in touch! 📧
Did you spot or make any mistakes this week? What are your best ways to grow a consistent tone of voice?
📷 For more tips and musings, head to my Instragram📸
